Signs of a Rebound Relationship

What is a Rebound Relationship? Are you or your Partner involved in a rebound fling? What are the Signs to identify a rebound relationship? The thought of writing on this topic came to me after I saw one of my own friends suffering from the aftereffects of such a relationship. The definition given for such a relationship according to the Wikitionary is ‘A relationship usually short in duration and used to help mend the broken heart.’ In other words, it can be called a bounce back relationship or a relationship formed too quickly after the breakup of a significant love relationship. Many times people involved in relationships also get into rebound relationships if they want their existing relationships to end especially when they have already emotionally distanced themselves from their partners.

For many Rebound flings serve as a distraction to forget the hurt, emotional pain and loneliness after the break up. Many people get into such relationships as a quick fix to forget their old partners and move on with their lives than feeling miserable over the relationship which ended. For some others it is the fear of being alone after a broken relationship which prompts them to get into the dating scene again fast. I understand that it is quite natural that one would want to leave behind a bad relationship and move forward in life, but majority of times rebound relationships only bring regret and further hurt. However, there are many signs to identify if you or your partner is involved in a rebound relationship.

As I have written above a Rebound Relationship is a relationship one may get into immediately after coming out of one. It may happen after a divorce or break up of a love relationship. Rushing into rebound relationships often end up with more hurt and pain. Have you or any of your friends rushed into a new relationship immediately after breakup only to get into a relationship with someone who was obviously all wrong and then regret? I have seen it happening with many of my friends and people who are known to me. But that is one of the most common after effects of Rebound Dating.

It is only natural to feel lonely or scared of being alone after a break up. But it would be wise to give your heart some time to heal. There is no point in getting scared to date again after a failed relationship. All you have to do is accept and believe that the earlier relationship was not meant for you than holding on to it and crying over it and that something better is in store for you. Dwelling on the past can only make one miserable. Many times after a break up people look out for comfort or shoulder to cry on in others and get into such relationship and often confusing it with a new relationship. Given are some Signs of identifying a Rebound Relationship.

1. Getting into a Relationship too fast: This is the most common sign of a rebound relationship. Especially if you have been in a long time relationship which went sour it is a natural feeling that you may want to bounce back to forget the hurt and pain of the previous relationship, get over your ex and get into a better relationship. It may act as a distraction or a form of catharsis, but remember not to allow your sense of urgency to rush in the wrong direction causing further heart break.
2. Expecting the Qualities of Ex or those he lacked in New Partner: Another common sign is expecting your new partner to make up for the shortcomings and mistakes of the old partner or expect him to have the qualities and traits you admired in your previous lover. It is also a normal tendency among many to draw comparisons between your current and ex boyfriend and talk openly about it. This type of behavior can make a person to be too demanding and ruin the new relationship too and end up being miserable.
3. Using Others as Rebound for self satisfaction or as a Tool Of Jealousy:Many people get into a rebound mode with the intention of hurting their ex or to show that they do not matter anymore without any intention of commitment or involvement and masking the purpose with the new person involved. It can be either way and usually someone ends up being used or hurt as a result because once the purpose of the rebound relationship is served that person would be abandoned. Beware of re bounders who may use you distract themselves from the pain of a broken heart and then move on leaving you to pick up the pieces. It is always best to be honest with your new relationship partner about your intentions. If you find yourself being used by a re bounder who has recently broken off a long term relationship it is best to let the relationship develop slowly and not allow your new partner to set the pace fast.
4. Unhappiness: Many times people who get into rebound relationships as a way to hit back at those who abandoned them. They may show themselves as outwardly happy when actually they feel miserable and guilty that they are doing something wrong. If you are in a relationship to soon and unhappy with the present partner then it is probably a rebound fling you are into.
5. Not able to forget Ex: This is another prominent sign that though you may have jumped into a new relationship soon after your breakup or divorce you keep thinking of your ex more than your current partner because you have not fallen out of love with your ex still. One may also not feel the same or better comfort level with the new partner because of this and may end up drawing comparisons between partner’s thereby ruining the new relationship with your own hands. If the old relationship interferes with the progress of a new relationship then chances are that you’re stuck in a rebound. Similarly, if you are involved with someone who had a recent break up and he/she keeps rehashing problems from the past relationship within the new relationship this is a clear sign that they haven’t moved on enough to fall in love again. It also could be a sign of rebound affair if you prefer frequenting places you have gone with your ex along with your new partner. As long as you harbor feelings for an old love a new love can’t happen. According to Feng Shui you have to make way for the new by clearing the old.

When you develop a relationship quickly after one ended, it is rarely based on love and most often does not last for long. However, for many rebounding can feel like love because of their craving for love and commitment. Many may convince themselves that they are in love when in reality they are really missing the relationship they left behind. It would be a wise move to give yourself some time after a break up and not rush into another relationship immediately as your judgment is clouded usually after heartbreak and you are likely to take a wrong decision. Many times when we are hurt we tend to do wrong things which we are likely to regret later. So it is better to experience and try to heal the pain than taking misguided attempts like rebound relationships to avoid the pain altogether. Experiences can make a person stronger and wiser so try to Deal with the pain of your old relationship before moving onto another one. That way you would be doing yourself and your new relationship partner a favor.